Coping With Loss

Losing something or someone that you really love is very devastating and painful. One may experience all kinds of difficult emotions and it may feel like the sadness he or she is experiencing will never go away. "You might feel a lot of emotions at once, or feel you're having a good day, then you wake up and feel worse again," says Sarah, who works at Trinity Hospice in London. She says powerful feelings can come unexpectedly. "It's like waves on a beach. You can be standing in water up to your knees and feel you can cope, then suddenly a big wave comes and knocks you off your feet."

Remember that healing happens gradually, it cannot be forced and hurried and there is no normal timetable for grieving. Whatever your grief experience is, you have to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold. For some people, relying on family and friends is the best way to cope.

It's important to seek help if you (NHS):

• Can't get out of bed
• Neglect yourself or family
• Loss of appetite and you feel you can't go on without the person you've lost
• Emotion is so intense that it affects the rest of your life, for example, you can't face going to work or you're taking your frustration and anger out on someone else
• Turning to alcohol and illicit drugs during difficult times

It is important that you talk and share your feelings with someone who can help. Don't go through this alone!