What makes you angry?

Anger is an emotional state that arises as a response to a possible threat. The body goes into defense mode and invokes expressions ranging anywhere between aggressive feelings to full blown fury and rage. Anger, though not always considered healthy, helps us fight for ourselves, a primal action necessary for survival. Sudden outbursts of anger can cause several problems emotionally and physically and can also end up hurting loved ones.

Insights to ‘what makes me angry?’

Anger, just like laughter or crying is a voluntary human emotion. Even if we cannot control our surroundings, or change them, we can change our perception of the situation. We can learn to control our own reactions and manage anger in a healthy way. This is probably the biggest challenge anger management sets for us. Most of the situations catch us unaware and with no thinking time, we tend to act on our emotions. Therefore, the best way to control anger is to first understand anger. Introspection is a very good way to do this. Begin by identifying the following:

Identify one or more or the following feelings you associate with anger:

• Embarrassment
• Excitement
• Disappointment
• Jealousy
• Fear
• Helpless
• Sadness
• Left-out

Identify one or more of the following thoughts that occur prior to any aggressive acts:

• You did that on purpose…
• You wanted to hurt me…
• You deserve this…
• You never even asked me…
• You’re being unreasonable…
• You think you’re so good…
• I’ll show you…
• You started it…
• There’s no justice

Identify one or more of the following physiological responses you face when you get angry:

• Blood rushing to your face
• Increased heart beat
• Excessive sweating
• Trembling

Identify one or more of the following potential consequences caused by your anger on self:

• Headaches/stomach aches
• Insomnia
• Increased stress levels and feelings of anxiety
• Injury caused by fighting
• Stroke
• Heart attack
• Depression

Identify one or more of the following potential consequences your anger has caused to others:

• Hard to keep friends, partners, family or employment,
• Hurt ourselves or others (often loved ones),
• Lead to loneliness and unhappiness

If you have checked more than one of the feelings under each group, it means that your anger is likely giving rise to problems for you and could be turning into a serious issue. You should consider seeking professional help from psychologist or a counselor who will help you develop a few techniques to control you anger, thinking, and behavior.